Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
