Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
The adults are the big ones right?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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