Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
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