Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize