If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
