i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
