Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
