if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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