we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
