I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
