Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
