Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
