You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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