im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
