dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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