I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize
