I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
