There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
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