Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
