gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
