is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
