You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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