found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
