I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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