Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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