i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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