i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
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