So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Randomize