fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
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