Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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