you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize