We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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