Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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