I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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