I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
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