On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
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