and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
