He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize