its not stalking. its research.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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