Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Randomize
