sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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