So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Randomize