i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize