Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
...so i touched it.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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