Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I just sucked dick on a ferry
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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