Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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