some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
