i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
