ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
