I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
your room smells of hookers.
And success
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize